Do you ever have those weeks that your entire life seems like a roller coaster? That is EXACTLY how the past couple of weeks has been for me. There will always be highs and lows no matter where you are on this journey. This week has been a roller coaster of emotions to say the least... with the light there is always dark. I used to run away from the darkness but now I embrace it and do my best to find the beauty in every situation. That is what personal development has done for me. Instead of gutting sucked into the negative downward spiral, I see the darkness for what it is but choose to see the light in all situations, even when death is knocking on the door.
Just in the past week, I have lost two souls who were very near and dear to my heart. My great grandma which is where my strength comes from and my best canine friend Lolah of 12 years.
Death can be scary but it certainly reminds us how short life really is. We learn to cherish the time we have here in this earth even if it’s only for a short time until the next death occurs. I have come close to death myself a few times but have managed to escape. I like to think that I have angels or someone close watching over me. Sometimes I’m not sure I deserve the live I have been given but I truly mean it when I am doing my best to live with no regrets. I plan to live my life to the fullest and then some!! Impacting as many lives as I can along the way. It is the least I can do for those who have helped me and saved me in this life.
Now with that some good things did happen this week. It was difficult for me to become excited between all of the tears but I managed to see a glimpse of what is to come. This month I joined a high level mastermind of ambitious women who are read to take on the world. I truly believe that investing in yourself in the quickest way to become the best version of you. It doesn’t matter if you invest in mastermind, coaching programs, education, fitness, nutrition or all of the above. I was stuck far too long on the idea that I had to do everything myself and I was stupid if I couldn’t figure it out. See, I am a highly educated, motivated, ambitious person and there were many things that I could not figure out on my own. Sometimes you just need new perspective and a kick in the ass to get shit done in your life.
Another good thing that happen is I passed a very difficult test that I have been studying very hard for in order to provide higher quality services to my community. You can always expect me to be continuously learning, growing and up-leveling! I plan to bring you along this journey and teach you all the things! I had the test the day after I laid my old lady Lolah pup to rest. Talk about difficult! I was bawling hysterically trying to squeeze in some last minute studying for this exam. I tried to cancel or reschedule but you have to do so within 72 hours and I was about a day and a half out. Plus I would have to forfeit the testing fees and wait another 30 days which I am totally against procrastination so I bucked up and go it done. Somehow by the grace of the universe, I passed that exam with a 90%. I cried when the lady handed me my test. I honestly thought I had failed.
It has been a LONG time since I’ve cried this much. I’ve cried tears of joy and tears of sadness within minutes of each other. The old Sausha would never show emotion like this. I would have kept it bottled up and exploded at some point in time. But I’ve learned to embrace the beauty of being human and emotions are part of that beauty. We all have them. Men, women, children, pets, everyone. And many of us have this fear that if we let our guard down and become too emotional that we may get hurt. That may be true but again… that’s the beauty of being human. We live, we learn, we love, we laugh, we cry and together we can rise up and learn to except one another as we truly are. Perfectly imperfect in every way. This is the circle and beauty of life. Embrace every part of it.
Today, live for those who are no longer living. Laugh for those who have lost their joy. Cry for those who cannot feel pain. Hug your loved ones like it's the last time you will see them. Live each day like it’s your last. Life life with no regrets. Do not hold back. Trust me when I say you do not want to be that person on your deathbed telling others to live because you played it safe.
What is your legacy?
LEGACY: what you leave behind for others, a gift handed down.